Monday, March 7, 2016

Let's all focus on this manufactured drama to avoid our real lives

The Real Housewives is my secret shame. Like a bad boyfriend, I've tried many times to dump this franchise of shows about insane women. I've watched every city. Even Miami. (And I don't know that anyone else watches that one, even Andy Cohen.)

So, when I found out about the The Real Housewives of Charlotte: A parody, I knew I had to go and I knew I had to take my friend Jean who is equally obsessed with these bitches.

The show was at the Booth Playhouse, which is a perfect smaller venue for this intimate feeling show. The cast of six (Randy Bowen and five housewives) uses a minimal script, improving for a majority of the show. For each city this national tour hits, they incorporate a ton of local jokes and references. I knew that we were in for a good show when they began with some typical opening credits that found the housewives holding Bojangles chicken boxes to represent the Queen City.

Each of the five housewives borrowed from the personalities of women from all of the cities to create one monster housewife.

There's Ravonka, (Lori McClain) who's terrible accent comes and goes. She claims to be royalty and carries a small dog around in her purse.

Gwen is a convicted felon who used to be former Mayor Patrick Cannon's top adviser. She was also convicted of running a toll booth on I-77 before it was ever approved. Her one-liners, including a joke about making Pat McCrory disappear, stole the show.

Brooke is a straight shooter from the tough streets of Kannapolis. She is an "entrepreneuress" whose latest business venture is butt writing on the seats of ladies' pants. Her greatest idea reads, "If you feel stuck, push harder."

Claudia Louise, who wants to me known as C.L., is the only housewife who is actually married. She gets to show off her husband, who was an unsuspecting audience member Mark. Poor Mark gets dragged into the show but manages to be a great sport all the way until the end of the show.

The final housewife is Desiree who says, "I always stick my neck out for my friends. Maybe that's because I am a neck model."

Jackson Evans did an amazing job portraying the glee and desperation of Andy Cohen. Every time the ladies announced sad news, he did a happy  jig. "We also have a tragedy this season," he gleefully told the audience. "And we're not going to tell you what it is yet, but we're going to tease the hell out of it and make you feel obligated to watch."

I think that's what's so intriguing to me about the housewives franchise. It's totally compelling television, but it's not my drama. There are no consequences for me. It's just fun TV. Sometimes, there is guilt in knowing that these are real people's lives. Or as Randy said, "Let's all focus on this manufactured drama to avoid our real lives."

The parody show, just like the Bravo franchise, is a fun escape from real life.