Thursday, March 10, 2011

Helping white people dance


"I mean, if you don't want to dance, go sit in the freakin' nosebleeds."

I heard this from a chatty woman in a massive bathroom line at the Brad Paisley concert in February. She complained to the woman next to her, also a stranger, about people who yelled at her while she was trying to get her grove on during Darius Rucker's set.*

My immediate reaction was to agree with her. Don't go to a concert if you don't want to dance.
But then I realized, I don't dance at concerts. I don't really dance at a lot of places. Or at all. If I do dance, well you can see for yourself what happens.

I danced with Winnie and Daisy in my empty house the day I got the keys to my first home of my own. I still dance with Winnie and Daisy in my bedroom (with the door closed) when I've had a good day.

Otherwise, any dancing I've done involves alcohol. I once, sober, sat through an entire Rascall Flatts concert in a lawn chair. The only time I stood up is when a Make a Wish Kid was brought on stage to sing.

At a sober Lenny Kravitz concert, I sort of awkwardly swayed once.

Why don't I dance? I just asked one of my best friends to give me a comment on my dancing.

"When Randi dances, she seems to enjoy herself. She is very enthusiastic. It doesn't happen often. Like me and all other pale people, Randi is white. I am sure that Randi is at least a good a dancer as I am," said Misty Ebel.

With that ringing endorsement, I would like to say that I would like to dance more. I really want to dance at the upcoming New Kids on the Block show.

I just don't want to hurt society in the process.

What about you? Do you dance at concerts? How do you not make a fool of yourself?

*I would like to note that even though I am not a concert dancer, I do not hate on those that do or demand they sit down. Whatever. Dance your pants off!

4 comments:

  1. See.. Firstly I think you have it all wrong.. it's about having a great time not whether you are making a fool out of yourself or not. I mean consider this... If you can dance at a wedding in front of all the people you know and care about then why not at a place where you don't know any1 or care what they think? I mean even if they would be judging you (which I doubt they would) the chances of you ever knowing about it is slim to none. So get out there.. HAVE A BLAST and you'll find the more you do it the better you'll feel about it and if it takes a few drinks at first so be it....

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  2. So, if you hadn't put so much pressure on me to come up with a quote immediately, I would have just borrowed from an old country song:
    "You got to sing like you don't need the money; Love like you'll never get hurt;
    You got to dance like nobody's watching."

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  4. Dance, girl! And if someone has a problem with it f 'em. :-)

    This is me making you accountable for including more sober (and drunk) dancing in your life. I want weekly updates.

    loves!

    me

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